Latte Art

Now I know you're all thinking "DW, you're brand new.  You're trying to make a name for yourself.  You could have chosen something more substantive to write about than 'Latte Art'...", and you're right.

But...

Look at the picture at the top of this article?  Doesn't it just scream "pretentious douche was here"??

And that's what this blog is all about: Finding the absurd and useless things about our culture and tearing them to shreds.

Now back to the foam scribbling.

I first became aware of latte art when I joined Instagram (expect an "Instagram" post at some point).  I couldn't go 4 or 5 pictures without seeing a picture like the one above.  "How cute", I thought "all these people have the same creative and outgoing barista". What I chalked up to happenstance, however, turned out to be a massive and sprawling subculture within the barista community. They even have a World Championship for this sort of thing.

Now normally, I'm not one to criticize hard work, or critique talent (goodness knows I'm not that talented), and some of the designs are actually pretty dang cool.  But, as happens to so many things that might have been cool, the people behind this stuff take themselves so damned seriously that you can't help but mock.

Take this website for example.  Just a small selection of the readings will tell you how seriously these people take themselves:

"We are about to introduce you to the most complex and difficult design you have ever done as a latte artist. This truly is where all of your skills come together to make latte art magic. We are going to make a Phoenix in a cup using the pour alone ... Get ready to dive into your greatest project as a latte artist yet"

Seriously?  You're pouring hot milk into (usually extraordinarily overpriced) coffee. Let's try to tone it down.


Consider the following, from the latte art wikipedia entry (yes, there's such a thing):

"Some controversy exists within the coffee community as to whether or not there is excessive focus on latte art amongst baristas. The argument is that too much focus on the superficial appearance of a drink leads some to ignore more important issues, such as taste."

Philosophical handwringing over milk art? Come on now.


And don't construe this as some kind of attack on baristas... I have family and friends who work(ed) in the java industry. I don't have any problems with taking pride in your work, but let's not pretend this is some kind of brain surgery.

To latte art, the worthless, nonalcoholic cousin of "flair bartending"!

- DW